One of the three hottest issues of our times is that of marriage & sexuality. The other two are social justice and Covid. A common problem in all three of these issues is the government. It’s the government that thinks it can define the marriage, it’s the government that thinks it can bring economic equity (by force, sometimes), and it’s the government that thinks it can mandate covid restrictions without qualifications. In all these areas, the long-term solution is to teach the truth (veritas) to our children. The best antidote against falsehood is more truth. So, in this article, I would like to provide a few key principles and book recommendations on teaching our children on marriage & sexuality.
First, God calls primarily upon parents to provide sex education to their children. Both in the Old and the New Testaments, God calls upon the parents to provide specific instruction and training (e.g. Joshua 8:35, Eph 6:4) about godly way of living, of which marriage and sexuality is central. God calls upon parents because teaching about marriage and sexuality involves modeling and training (discipleship), as well as instruction.
Second, marriage and sexuality is not just a private “ethical” issue. It has everything to do with our relationship with God (theological issue), moral education of our children (educational issue), and the welfare of our society (social issue). This is why parents must teach marriage and sexuality to their children early and throughout their childhood. Marriage and sexuality, as taught in the Bible, is at the heart of how we can truly enjoy God as a family, and as a society. If people are redefining marriage and sexuality that is different than what God revealed in the Bible, they are redefining the goals of life, and there is nothing more foolish than that.
Third, if parents do not teach their children a biblical perspective on marriage and sexuality, then children will learn an unbiblical view of these topics from the world (usually via social media) by default. Parents cannot naively think that their children will learn the proper views on their own. Church and Christian schools like Veritas play important roles on providing the biblical framework as well as an ethical/cultural standard, but it is the parents that play the most important role.
Fourth, final goals of teaching our children on marriage & sexuality are not only that they embrace the biblical vision on these topics with deep understanding and joy, but also that they be able to articulate them to the world in a winsome manner. Since marriage & sexuality is at the heart of a culture, training our children in the biblical view of marriage & sexuality is one of the most effective ways of equipping them to reach out to those who do not know Christ.
With that in mind, here are top two recommended books for parents to use in teaching their children on the topic of marriage & sexuality.
Preparing Children for Marriage. By Josh Mulvihill A great single-volume introductory book on teaching biblical view of marriage & sexuality for children of all ages. How & When to Tell Your Kids about Sex. By Stan & Brenna Jones. A bestselling 5-volume books, one for the parents, and four age-appropriate books, on a biblical view of marriage & sexuality in the home.